I Wanted To Be in Eden

This is how I picture the Fall of Man.

I Wanted To Be in Eden
By: Amanda Pate
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I remember everything back in those days, days where I didn’t have to toil with the ground to plant crops. Days that I would run underneath the trees with Him. Days that I would talk to Him face to face. Those wonderful days.

I remember how He had breathed life into my lungs. He gave me life, sweet life. I had never felt so alive than I had in that moment. I would go among the trees He had made grow so tall and strong. It was beautiful, His creation. All His glory displayed in the things He made. The Great Artist, He is. Even the stars He hung in the night sky seemed to sparkle with His splendor.

I remember the day He made my helper; my wife, He called her. I don’t remember this part much. He put me to sleep, and later told me how He took my rib out from my body and from that He made the beautiful creation in front of me. She was another testament to His great glory. He had made her with His own hands. Had shaped the very outline of her face with His fingertips.

All three of us would walk among the garden He had created. We would talk of many things, but one conversation -one important conversation -stuck out above all others. He had told us specifically there was one tree that we were not to eat of. The tree of the knowledge of good and evil, He called it. I thought it was funny, He chose that one of all trees to make evil. It was tall and strong, the branches thick and heavy with ripe fruit. It was appealing to the eye and just thinking about it made my mouth water, but I would obey Him; He was the One who gave me life after all.

All we wanted to do was spend our time with Him. He was a wonder! Everything He did was all glory and splendor. We believed Him fully, or so we thought. One afternoon, after we had just finished our walk with Him, my wife and I walked to the center of the garden. The great tree loomed in the waning light of the afternoon. The sun played a certain dance among the great tree and its branches, making it change from looking ominous to inviting, sumptuous even.

My wife walked a bit closer to the tree and I followed. When she got close enough to touch the tree with an extended hand, she hesitated. And both our eyes caught on an animal by the tree. It was a serpent and it spoke, “Did He actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden?’”

My wife, knowing full well what He had told us, corrected the serpent and told him that we could eat and touch any tree except this one, for if we did we would die.

“You will not surely die.” the serpent mused in its raspy voice, “For He knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like Him, knowing good and evil.”

We both looked at each other. Was it so? Had He tricked us because He hadn’t wanted us to be like Him? Innocence had been all we had known, and this thought, this blasphemy, was planting and taking root within our minds. I remember how it felt; the tingling of new ideas, like I was no longer ignorant of what was being done behind my back.

My wife looked away from me and without a word, took the fruit from the tree and bit into it. She turned and stared straight into my eyes, juices from the fruit trailing down the side of her face. She held the forbidden fruit in front of me, silently seducing me.

I took it from her hand, looking at the fruit’s bright color, the color of ripe. I held it up to my lips and bit into the fruit. An explosion of sweetness made my mouth surrender to its overwhelming flavor and I sucked the juices dribbling from my mouth as I lowered the fruit from my face. As soon as I swallowed the large bite I had in my mouth, its taste became that of ash, not the sweet burst my tongue had met a moment ago.

Something within me changed. My eyes became clearer. I saw my wife standing before me. Her face was bittersweet. She had gotten what she had wanted. She had tasted of the fruit, but we both knew that we had gone against His one rule. I looked at her more fully and saw that she was naked and I saw myself and realized that I also was naked. We both blushed crimson and rushed into the forest to find something in order to cover ourselves with.

We came across one of the many fig trees within the garden and began cinching leaves together to make coverings for us. We had not realized, but night was coming swiftly upon us, and with the twilight, we heard Him walking through the garden. We looked at each other, fear reflecting in our eyes. What would He do to us since we went against His word?

We ran and hid ourselves among the great trees. His footsteps approached as if He knew exactly where to find us, but instead of looking behind the tree, He called after us, asking where we were.

I could not stand lying to Him any longer. I knew I would die today, but I just couldn’t bring myself to lie to Him a second time. I stood out from behind the tree I had been hiding and walked toward Him, my fig leaf-clothes rustling with an unsettling newness.

My head was low; I dared not even look Him in the eye. I told Him that I had heard Him approach but was afraid because I was naked. I was ashamed. My disobedience was repulsive.

“Who told you that you were naked?” He asked. His voice sounded betrayed and saddened. “Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?”

I could not even nod my head. Instead, I said, “The woman, whom you gave to be with me, she gave me the fruit of the tree and I ate.” I could not take all the blame; she had a rather large part in this as well, but even as the words came out of my mouth, I could still taste the bitterness of the fruit, the sin.

I watched as He turned to face her, “What is this that you have done?” I looked behind me to where He was staring; she had come out from behind the tree that we were both previously hiding.

Her cheeks were a bright blushed pink, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.” She said in a small voice.
My heart ached within my chest at her confession. We would both surely die now.

His attention spun to the serpent that was cowering, watching the scene from a distance. The serpent approached slowly and slyly, every movement provocative. He cursed it, and made it slither on its belly instead of walk like it had been not but a moment before.

Shamed, the serpent crawled on its belly out of sight never to be seen again. There was a pause in conversation. No one uttered a single word or made a sound. I thought at first He might let us go and just curse the snake, for it was the serpent that deceived us in the beginning.

However I was extremely wrong. He spoke once again to my wife, telling her he would make child labor painful and that as her husband, I would rule over her. He then told me that I would toil with the land and eat from whatever grew, but that it would not only produce fruit and other foods, but thorns and thistles as well, and by my sweat, I would take from the ground until I returned to the dust of the earth.

The judgment was swift and hurtful, but it was just. I still could not bear to look up at Him. He provided us with clothes and then ushered us out of the garden gates, out of the lush green land inside. He appointed an angel to guard the gate with a fiery sword so that we could never enter the garden again.

I looked out among the sparse land. It was empty compared to His beautiful green garden, which was so rich with vegetation. Tears came to my eyes. I looked back at the great angel. He had thick armor and looked fierce with the flaming sword near his face, but it was what was behind him that made my eyes overflow with tears.

I wanted to be back talking with Him amongst the trees. I wanted to run and enjoy the lungs He so graciously breathed life into, I wanted to be in the comfort and shelter of His arms, I wanted to be naked and unashamed.

I wanted to be in Eden.
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Author’s Note: This is based on the story in Genesis chapters 1-3. If this is anyway contradictory to those passages, do not take my word; instead, believe the Holy Scriptures.

This was strongly inspired by God and Phil Wickham’s song ‘Eden’.

I wrote this a while ago, but I have been reading through Genesis for my Old Testament class and this spoke to me all the more, so I thought I would share! :)